Bistro with FoF

6WF letters appear on screen.
The bong squad plays.
As clips of previous guest appearing is shown.
VO: On the first day God created Earth, on the second food and water, and on the 3rd day Dubois was created! A man not afraid to ask the tough questions that everyone wants answers for! A man who educates the 6WF universe each and every week! A man who used his father’s money to learn about the Dutch culture in Amsterdam! In...the....red...light....district.....And a man who got his father to create his own show! Now tonight one of the most controversial tag teams of the 21 century appears. Former rock star turned into wrestlers. Ladies and Gentlemen...Jerome DUBOIS!
“Les demons de minuits” plays out comes Dubois with the pen in hand covered in blood and a internet title.
JD: Hahahaha Bonsoir mes Amis! Welcome to another thrilling addition of Ze Bistro! First dough i would like to congratulate myself. I would like to congratulate myself over my victory against Abe Abecorn at Survival! I dominated and embarrass zis old timer and i proved exactly why Dubois is a sensation!
Marcel Begins to clap franticly and runs to open a bottle of champagne.
JD: Aaaaa Thank You Marcel would you mind opening the bottle of Don Perignon?
Marcel Opens but it begins to spill all over Dubois
JD: MARCEL M”2RDE WAT IZ ZIS!
ELC: Hey Cain Dubois pissed himself!
CR: Dude that just wrong...
JD: Non it iz Marcel he....
ELC: No excuses Dubois man thats just nasty.
The screen goes blank and a photo of Dubois appears Drinking champagne.
VO: We will be right back
Ze Bistro appears on screen. Dubois is in another sharp suit with the internet title still and his pen covered in blood.
JD: Welcome back mes amis to ze Bistro my guests at zis time is Fist of errrr Foon.
ELC: Stop laughing Cain...
CR: His accent is just ridiculously funny Foon? I mean wahahahaha.
JD: Did i mess a joke?

CR:
ELC: He is going to be like this for a while now cheers Dubs...
CR: I mean look at his cute lil internet title isn’t even the real one!
JD: Non but i am so great dat ze people deserve to see ze greatest man in ze 6WF with gold around his waist!
CR: Did you get that on EBAY or something! Whahaha
JD: Non i complained to ze board...They told me if i shed up dey will send me one and here we are today...But why do people always want me to shed up i never understand...
CR: Cause you are an....
ELC: Calm Cain we only just started!
JD: Mais oui sacre i forgot to even ask a question! How did Fist of ze Foon start?
CR: Wahahaha!
ELC: I guess i will handle this question...
CR: If you don’t mind Eddie, let me answer that one. (Cain picks up a guitar and starts strumming)
Eddie waited till he finished high School.
He went to Holywood, got a tattoo
He met a gril out there, with the Tattoo too,
The future was wide open.”

ELC: (singing) “We moved into a place, we both could afford
I found a nightclub, I could work at the door,
She had a guitar and she taught me some chords
The sky was the limit”

CR: “The Papers said Ed always played from the heart,
He got an agent and a roadie named bart
He made a record and it went in the chart
The sky was the limit”

ELC: “My leather jacket had chains that would jingle,
We met movie stars, partied and mingled,
The A&R man said I don’t hear a single
The future was wide open”

Cain (puts down the car) So he dumped her, diddled loads of chicks and formed Fist of fun

JD: MARCEL STOP IT WITH ZE DANCING! Zis is hardly sophisticated music....But i must credit you for making it up on ze spot oui?
ELC: Well just like you Dubois we are Phenomenal!
JD: Impossible dere is only one phenomene and dat is me!
CR: Naa Dubs FoF is pretty awesome so i would say indeed we are Phenomenal!
JD: Here is 1000 EUR for each of you... Now as i was saying there is only one Phenomene and dat iz me!
ELC: Totally agree!
CR: Dam i could get me a nice hooker with this cash cheers Dubs!
JD: Tell us a bit of Eddie Lee and something that world might not know about you?

ELC: good question but a hard one to answer as most women know every part of me. Some of those fans are mentalists! But one thing I always kept secret is that I have a twin brother who I was separated from at birth and who I have never met.

CR: Yikes! Well I am sure that we will never hear about him ever again.

ELC: Yeah! Its like that part of my life will never be mentioned again and will in no way feature in some protracted storyline at a later date .
JD: Aye brothers are noting but trouble my one is a priest turned pimped turned i do not know what. He wishes to get revenge me for what i did to our mother but dat is for another day and another interview with Dubois!
ELC: Pretty deep Dubs maybe you could let us know on the Talk to the Fist!
JD: Do you ave foie gras?
CR: Beer....
JD: Bah the peasants champagne! You will need to improve ze image of your set before i consider it!

ELC: We have forsters.... is that better?
JD: Bah i refuse to answer to that
CR: I think we got him now Eddie!
JD:..... What was it like being on top of the music industry?


ELC: It was hard. Well it was 5 times a night. But soon the partying caught up with us both. I went on a downward spiral that only ended by being kicked out of the band by Cain

CR: Although eddie was gone, the pressures remained and I had to face my own demons as well.

JD: was it Drugs? Alcohol?

CR: Tetris and Fishermans friends. I was addicted to the combination of those falling shapes and the sharp menthal taste of the seas.
JD: We have all been zerre mon ami. Tetris was Dubois one kryptonite. Dam zzat theme song was catchy and ze shapes falling faster and faster! Put it in ze spaces as zey keep coming ze pressure of ze bricks and your pile increasing.
Dubois and Cain look at each other and both pull out there old fashion game boys and begin to play.
ELC: Cain give it!
M: Dubois mon ami I thought we got through dis!
ELC: Cain give it!

CR: No!
Marcels pulls out of Dubois hands
JD: My Tetris!
Eddie takes out a bag of fishermens friends.
ELC: Cain you see bag? Hein?
Cain looks at the bag of Fishmen friends with envy.
ELC: Give me the game boy and i will give you one!
CR: .......
ELC: Fine Two!
Cain with haste return the gameboy and throws the fishermen friends in his mouth
JD: Is zis what caused ze downfall or i mean what caused your downfall?

Cain and Eddie point at each other “Him”

ELC: “He kicked me out”

CR: He set the bar so high that the band imploded. The band was never the same after the main guy left – the same thing happened to Iron Maiden, Queen, Sugababes”

JD: Never heard of any of dose bands...

ELC: Your kidding right?
JD: Non Non i know Johnny Halliday, Alizee, Serge Gainsbourg, and many more!
ELC: I know Halliday.
JD: Really?
ELC: No....
JD: How did you deal with the addiction?

ELC: Well, I kicked the dragon in the nuts and diddled his wife! I looked at what I lost and decided it was time to move on”

Cain “I replaced his pills with Smarties – he never knew until he was off them!”
JD: Know ze feeling i spent a night of paradise with Napalm Girl!
ELC: Just a bit sick...
JD: Non Non she was how you say Kinky?
CR: Think i am going to be sick...

JDHow do you feel you wrestling career has gone?

ELC: Hit and miss

Cain “ we hit our opponents and they miss us”
JD: Or like it shows in ze past you lose to Dubois remember Eddie when you debut and i destroyed you?
ELC: Dubs i had just learn the basics now you will last as long as your girl did with me. What was it 15 times in 20 min with her?
Dubois looks at Clara ferociously. As she looks on embarrassed.

ELC: Anyway responding to your question, the fans love us and we win most of the time but we have big stage nerves. Which is unusual, bearing in mind the stadiums we’ve sold out”

CR: and the women we’ve serviced en masse
JD: Aaaa you ze French?
CR: Mais oui!

JD: Why haven't you capture any titles?

CR: We’ve been unlucky Mr Jerome. A combination of cheating, illegal holds, weapons have all been involved.

ELC: and that was us doing it!

JD: Who is the weaker member in your team?

Eddie and Cain “Scuzz McKenzie....
JD: Who is he?
CR: our roadie.

Dubois “Your thoughts on stepping in the ring with the french sensation Jerome Dubois and losing!
ELC: No comment....

JD: What are you thoughts of Dubois?

ELC: It would be an honour to be able to step into the ring and defeat a man of your calibre. It would be up there with wrestling Doink in the indies”

Dubois “do you think that he is destined for greatness or are you just another jealous parasite like JJ and Tyson?”

ELC: I think you are indeed destined for greatness Dubz”
Dubois shakes Eddie hands in gratitude.

CR: yeah! Eddie and I think that you could go on to win some great titles....like Masterchef, Ready Steady Cook, a few Michellin stars. These crab cakes are awesome!
JD: Uncultured pig you should follow ze example of your partner!
CR: He follows me!

JD: What do you think of the cross brand wars?

ELC: Its been great for us. We’ve had the chance to diddle our way across the 6CW roster as well!

CR: Lex Harts missus was smokin’!
JD: I know she is like a delicate flower that needs some caring....
ELC: Ye she is a slut mate!
JD: A slug?
CR: He is to young Eddie!

JD: Favorite personel in the company?

ELC: I think Napalm is the nuts

CR: I think Napalm is nuts

Dubois “FoF greatness moment so far here?

Eddie “Easy! Riding down on that huge polystyrene fist at Trashdown was rock n roll to the max”

Cain “Mine was diddling Black widow”

Eddie and Dubois look at Cain in disgust

Dubois “Dream feud?”

Eddie “I would love to face some of the great tag teams that we used to watch. People like Chaduculosis and Trash TV “

Cain “Failing that, I would like to be in a bra and panties match with Muffins and Jess”

Dubois “Thoughts on Cassius?

Eddie “The greatest boxer of all time”

Dubois “Did you attack him?

Cain “that was Parkinsons mate”

Dubois” Where were you at the time?

Eddie “Cant be sure but I would imagine we were on the tour bus with some lucky, lucky ladies. Where were you?”
JD: What a question i was eating foie gras and drinking Champagne!

Dubois “the Future for FoF?”

Cain “Well we gotta win some gold. Thats part one of our world domination. Then we go solo for a while and win some of the lower belts.”

Eddie “And by the time Born in Fire comes around, we are each going for one of the world titles. And then we reform, release a album and diddle ourselves to an early grave”

Cain “unless your twin brother shows up and ruins things of course”

Eddie “No more mentioning him please”

Cain “thanks for your time Dubz – do you promise to come on Talk to the Fist soon?”

Eddie “Although we haven’t done one in a while, your more than welcome....”
JD: Foie gras champagne i will come but first contact my agent!
“ Les dmons de minuits!” hits
JD: Thank for watching zis editions of Ze Bistro join us next week for our surprised guest! Until zen try not to do anything stupid and tune into Survival zis Sunday!

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